I had anticipated writing this entry about my trip to the AGC and the Arnold Classic… Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to attend either (which, yes, I am bitter about – but I digress.) So, in keeping with theme I decided to compile a list of health and fitness pet peeves.
***Let me preface this by saying I am by no means an expert, I have no professional training in kinesiology. In fact I dropped my Bio 101 – Biology of Food class because it was too hard.**
So with that said, here is my list of 8 things that really grind my gears:
1) Gym Thumpers
We all have that friend or family member who just LOVES Jesus – not that I have a problem with that, but please don’t beat me over the head with it. Just like I don’t want to read Psalms and scriptures all over my SoMe, I don’t want to see that you’re checked into LA Fitness again, or your awkward post-gym locker room selfie on Facebook. If you’re healthy and working out, we’ll either notice or we won’t. (Now it may seem hypocritical because this blog is going to be a lot of my health/fitness journey, but you signed up for that when you came here.)
2) Gym Virgins
I’ve become a big fan of Awkward Gym Moments because it 1)Shows that I am not the only one who doesn’t know what they’re doing half of the time and 2) I go to Planet Fitness, so I see this shit happen in real life…a lot. Part of me wants to take the time to say “you would get better results if you did it like this…” but who am I, right? So I sit back and watch the train wreck. The pretty girl running on the treadmill like a gerbil on its wheel, or the guy just ASKING to throw his back out on a lat pull down. Also, talking to people who mispronounce Acai (usually uh-ki) and Chia (like the pet) I want to kill myself.
3) The “Hey, come here often?” douchebags
Anecdote: I was stretching at the end of a workout (headphones in still) and two young guys walked behind me and said “Daaayum, alright Miss New Booty”…. I was not amused.
We’re at the gym, not the bar. I’m sweaty, I smell, I’m wearing no makeup and my hair is a mess, what makes any man think this is the ideal time to pick up women? Headphones are staying in “Not now chief, I’m in the f***ing zone!”
One of the top reasons I refuse to work out in the Rec Center of Wright State. Do you need every dumbbell between 25-55lbs? Say it with me: RERACK THE WEIGHTS!
This goes back to it being a gym and not a bar. The gym is for working out, unless you are this girl: Still wearing a full face of makeup and not a hair out of place. Unless of course, it’s a messy bun, then you must continue to redo the messy bun until it is the perfect amount of messy but still polished and cute. You’re probably wearing an “I don’t sweat, I sparkle” neon tank over your VS yoga pants. No bitch, you sweat, if you want to sparkle I know a few clubs on North Dixie that are always looking for girls.
6) Planet Fitness haters
The “Judgment Free Zone” is actually pretty judgey. No grunting, no deadlifts, no cleans, pretty much anything you would do in a Crossfit gym is a no-go. If you’re dedicated to a life of fitness, this gym is NOT for you. However, for me, and the many other regular Joe Schmoe kind of people who are looking to be healthy and get into shape it’s great.
Grievances: They have a PIZZA and BAGEL day. AT THE GYM. Dafuq?! I thought this was a joke, until I walked in one day and saw nearly thirty Papa John’s boxes full of hot cheesy goodness. Come, hungry fat people, reward your healthy activity with an equally unhealthy treat! I’m ashamed to be a part of this.
This is not a mega gym, there are a limited number of smith machines. If I can’t squat because you are checking Facebook, texting your girlfriend, or Jesus Christ, having a full on conversation on your cell phone – I can only think of a limited number of ways to say hang it up or GTFO.
I read a blog post a few months ago that really opened my eyes to something I had experienced a million times but never paid attention to: Skinny shamming? It sounds silly but psychologically takes its toll. I’ve never been a big/fat/chubby person but don’t tell me I “don’t need to work out or eat healthy” just because I’m thinner than you.
“If you’re a woman who thinks it’s okay to tell a skinny woman that she needs to eat a sandwich, I hope you don’t mind when that skinny woman tells you that you’re a fat ass. Because that’s exactly the sort of shaming you’re giving her.”
I don’t want to be the flabbiest skinny girl this summer. I want to squat my way to an ASS not just Big Booty Judy. I want to lift and eat my way to a better body and a better me. Shame on you for trying to take that from me. Put down the fork and pick up some tennis shoes, Hunny.